Over the years, as my own journey unfolded, I opened many doors in an effort to heal my soul.
You see I, like many, experienced early childhood trauma caused my generations of addicts.
Now don’t get me wrong, we are all addicts in one way or another. Shopping, food, sex, heroin, prescription drugs, success, stress and even sunbathing and hedonism in general creates a synthetic way to flood our brain with feel good hormones.
As an adult, I can see where my mom was trying to self-medicate a rare genetic blood disease and her own trauma from childhood. Poverty has a certain level of addiction because many people are depressed and stressed at a base survival mode. I’ve been there. And raising 2 children in the 70’s couldn’t have been easy.
But it’s the environment that is worth introspection. The political environment, going to the moon, tv and radio media beginning the mind programming agenda, the consciousness that was available was post-60’s, feminism, wars, and assassinations.
That shit was some crazy shit! Can you imagine today’s contrast?
So all has been forgiven. She did the best she could. If she could have done better, she would have done better. For a myriad of reasons that I don’t even fully comprehend as an adult, my little girl child recorded the entire childhood event, which became my brain circuitry. Trauma, stress, abuse, verbal & physical & sexual, stress, survival, poverty, and fear. My little girl child experienced a lot of trauma.
Because the mind is not separate from the body, and the body is not separate from the environment in which I was raised. So things were proceeding according to my subconscious mind.
For spiritual reasons, I can see I was put into a situation to evolve out of. Finding an exit, taking a risk and deciding I deserved better. That I actually mattered. That this shit was crazy but I was the observer to it. I often felt this wasn’t my tribe, or my people and somehow I got dropped off at the wrong house.
But I look much too much like my mother, so I ruled that out early. lol
Needless to say, we weren’t concerned about creating health, we lived in total survival mode.
When I discovered health, I didn’t even know it was a CHOICE. But the true core of pursuing health requires a HUGE commitment that we assume is there. I know better now, that’s it not. Many people come to see me to help them reflect what’s happening in life. To see where disease is showing up as unresolved trauma in the body.
Because I’ve been down that route myself and witnessed many of souls on the same journey.
Your body tells me what trauma you have witnessed, where it’s residing and some possible paths to begin the health path.
First you must decide you want to live.
And not just live, but be ALIVE.
That can’t be assumed at this stage.
Next time we will discuss the spiritual truth of internal baptisms and why they have a profound effect on healing.